I Hate Monday: Edition #12

IN: I Hate Monday

 

Welcome to I Hate Monday, obvoiusly the most productive way to procrastinate
until it’s not Monday anymore.

 

  1. Know why Danielle Laporte’s been so wildly successful? Because she doesn’t just give you advice. She gives you advice wrapped in story. It’s the story—the language, the imagery, the way it makes you relate to her and love her—that is the real reason everyone on the web is going ga-ga. Check out the only 2015 review post I didn’t want to vomit while reading.
  2. Can we talk about the fact there’s an inflatable pillow in this hoodie? THERE’S A PILLOW. ON-DEMAND. IN YOUR HOODIE. Could this be the traveler’s new best friend? (Also, my new best friend at wine and cheese parties?)
  3. This ad. What a fantastic way to break away from the sea of sameness of every other health care provider. (Also, if you go to the link in the ad, they continue on the same look & feel with the farmer, helping to provide really great cohesion from ad to landing page. This helps people know they landed in the right place, and continues the trust & like chain through to the next action step.)
  4. I deserve it.” We justify a looootttttt of our naughty behavior with these three little words. (And in fact, this theme has even made its way into the manuscript for my forthcoming book.) Right before we drink that whole bottle of wine, go on that TV binge, or blow off work for the day, the words “I deserve it” likely ring in our ears. I KNOW YOU KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT, SON. Here, one of my all-time favorite mentors, Lisa, talks about eliminating these three words from your vocab diet, and two other ways you can be more happy, healthy and sane in the New Year.
  5. Notice this subheadline description copy. They don’t go into all this design jargon and try to impress you with bells and whistles right out of the gate. They simply tell you HOW IT’S BEST USED. And, it’s delightfully effective. (Bonus points for making you select a color right then and there. The more a user personalizes the experience, the more ownership they feel, and the more likely they are to buy.)
  6. I recently ordered a pair of these Sleep Phones for myself—mostly because as someone who thinks for their job, I can’t afford to lose sleep when the vacation house that sleeps nineteen people next door gets visitors for the holidays or, you know, fireworks are going off at 2 o’clock in the morning. (Apparently it’s a Costa Rican thing?) I’d always tried sleeping with Apple earbuds, but have you ever tried that shit? Once your head hits the pillow, it’s like ramming a pencil up your ear. Which is precisely why I thought a fleece headband with a long, paper thin, rubbery speaker inside it would work WONDERS. Turns out, I’m loving them.
  7. Speaking of sleeping, I also use this brainwaves app sometimes at night, which suppppppposedly alters your brain waves to the proper state, based on your goals. I’ve gotta tell you, though: Every time I put it on the “Dreamy Sleep” setting, BOY DO I HAVE VIVID DREAMS. The other night, I dreamt I was touring a factory and some guy came in shooting with a machine gun. I screamed and ducked underneath a desk, and then proceeded to disarm him (somehow?!) the second he wasn’t looking. Then, apparently all of ISIS was after me as I ran around some fancy hotel in a gold sequin dress. So basically what I’m telling you is that apparently the only time I fit into a gold sequins dress is in my dreams, and also you should hide this app from your kids.
  8. The New York Public Library now has an online digital collection, and yes, you absolutely should be wetting your pants about this. For example, here’s an entire collection of historic book jackets (especially cool for designers and writers). Here’s a fascinating (and unfortunate) collection of Puerto Rican slave documents, listing individual slaves, their physical characteristics, and ownership. And here’s an archive of historical restaurant menus, dish by dish, for some old world inspiration!
  9. I can’t believe this actually exists. I thought this was a joke when I saw this happening on The Good Wife. Can you imagine how much of a douche you would look like if you sent this thing on your behalf to a parent teacher conference?
  10. Learn piano online. This is brilliant.
  11. Pick a goal and bet money on yourself. If you fail, you pay the money. If you succeed? You can keep it. Think you’ll lose those 20 pounds if you’ve got $5,000 on the line? You can—ahem—bet your ass you will. (Those guys really need to use that in their messaging.)
  12. THIS IS THE COOLEST THING I HAVE SEEN ALL WEEK. (In theory, anyway.) It’s a device you wear around your neck that translates for you in real-time. Basically what this mean is the next time I go to France, all the French men won’t look at me with such disdain as I try to pronounce “ratatouille.” (Then again, the French will hate me even more for being so daft as to be wearing a plastic device around my neck. You can’t win with these guys!) That said, the best part of this product is, by far, the product video, which has a British guy going around asking for kisses in Japan. Must-watch for a giggle! (I belly laughed out loud.)
  13. Obsessed with this. (Read the New York Times article about this flower business, too!)
  14. Speaking of the New York Times, I really enjoyed this opinion piece titled, “You Don’t Need More Free Time.” In it, this sociologist at Stanford argues we need more constraints over our time—not less—in order to properly enjoy the free time we *do* have.
  15. Love this trick and have used this myself: Writer takes his words and re-reads them in 8pt font, forcing him to see his writing from a new perspective.
  16. This hilarious video that shows what an American woman would do in a variety of situations…versus what a French woman would do.
  17. “In studies, people who interpret their racing heart or their sweaty palms as a sign that their body is giving them energy actually do better under pressure—they perform better, they make better decisions, and they impress others more.” Read the article here.
  18. Word of the week.
  19. By far, the most disgusting thing I’ve thought about recently.
  20. For my artsy craftsy folks who have been dying to get on Etsy (or maybe already are), but have no idea what to do next, Etsy created a neat four week community-led training program to get you rolling in 2016.
  21. How messy problems can inspire creativity.
  22. This is a GREAT read on how we learn fairness.
  23. If you have ever wondered how the publishing world works—how much do authors make? How much does the publishing house make? How much revenue do books like 50 Shades of Grey produce?this analysis by Steven Pressfield is a must-read. (Also, big ups to Simon and Schuster for a deal they recently made allowing the author to keep eBook rights!)

 

There we go. Politely piss off now, Monday. We’ll see you next week.

Love,

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